Chronic illness sometimes is unseen by others.
Others cannot feel what they cannot see.
So if sometimes I look well, but I tell you I am in pain
please do not judge me, I wish I “was” well again.
Illness is not my choice it’s what life dealt to me.
For you to disbelieve me or doubt me, breaks my heart.
For you are my Family, Doctor or even a Good Friend.
Must I earn your “trust” all over again?
Chronic means on and off but always there
Today I may be able to do something, tomorrow maybe I can’t. I have to try hard to work within my limit.
Or the next day I may wind up at the clinic.
Funny how when you have a chronic illness and you finally adjust. You find that it has led to another and you must handle that too. Sometimes you have two or even more,
oh my what a chore.
At times, I have mood swings I cannot control
I may snap and yell, well this I am told
If I do I am sorry, but please understand,
I’m not angry at you, I just need a hand.
I try to do what I’ve done before
perhaps even a simple chore.
But then I find that my muscles don’t seem to work anymore.
I want to be that parent, grandmother or friend
the one I “lost” when this illness came upon.
The one I tried to be when I was there for you.
The one I “was” when I was able to do.
Every time I say no to you, don’t be angry at me.
Every no I have to say reminds me
I am “not” normal anymore.
So please, don’t doubt me, just try to understand.
It was not my choice! It is just God’s Plan.